SECTION 1: Projecting The Future...
1. Would I want to spend the rest of my life with this person exactly as they are?
2. Would I want this person to raise my child?
3. Would I want my child to be exactly like this person?
SECTION 2: Are You Talking Yourself Into A Relationship?
4. Do I want to rescue or "help" them because I see their potential?
5. I love the way they look or their status and it builds my self-esteem to be with them.
6. We have some things in common and so I'm avoiding looking at glaring differences.
7. They appear to be totally different than people I've been with in the past.
8. I'm focusing on one important quality (money, sex, fun, humor, etc...) and ignoring unmet requirements.
SECTION 3: Danger Signs...
9. Reacts to frustration with anger, rage, blame
10. Blames others or circumstances for life situation
11. Tries to control everything, including me
12. Immature, impulsive, and/or irresponsible
13. Emotionally distant or void, aloof
14. Still pining for a past relationship
15. Wants me to make their sad life better
16. Married or otherwise unavailable to commit to me
Active addiction, addictive behavior (rationalized as "not a problem")
SECTION 4: Other Common Red Flags...
18. Is pessimistic and negative about things that matter to me
19. Lacks integrity in dealing with people, money, etc.
20. Judgmental attitude toward themselves & others
21. Unwilling to self-examine, accept feedback, take responsibility
22. Doesn't keep agreements
23. What they say about them-self doesn't match reality
24. Emotional roller coaster, recurring or regular emotional drama
25. This isn't what I really want, but I don't want to be alone
26. Changeable, inconsistent behavior
27. Inability to listen
28. I notice myself trying to change this person to fit what I want, instead of accepting them for who they are
29. Talks too much (especially about self), monopolizes conversation
30. Overly quiet, withdrawn
Total checked items from II, III, and IV...
On a scale from 0 (not at all) to 100 (perfect fit), my minimum score for considering ANY relationship is...
Using the above scale, I score this relationship...
Should YOU Stay or should YOU go? Submit your answers and find out.
Thanks for your interest, we'll get back in touch soon!